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| So feel like fall into this high school drama of who is popular, who is your friend, who is invite to the party...
so don't want to miss any party, don't want to miss any gathering, don't want to miss any happy hour..
so feel kinda sad..kinda left out.. when i am not invite to the wedding..s..
so maybe i care b/c i want to feel i belong, so maybe i care b/c i thought this is the first time i am "closer" to fit in...
so........
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| So i am in this mental big mess that i am not suppose to have at this age
so where to go next? where to live in two months? what to do with the rest of the life? no clear direction, no clue, no answer....
i need to got out of this depression and be aggressive and be positive...
but i don't know how...
i am tired but i can't sleep, sleepless nights and wide open eyes till 5 in the morning need to be stopped.. i am frustrated that after two years of searching that i still can't quit figure out myself...
i just want to get away.. maybe go travel by myself...
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| so here comes the cross road again
what is my next step?
where will i be?
who will give me a job?
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| bye bye~ Austin
ever since i came to the u.s., i have been lived in austin,
11 years, austin is the place i call home other than taipei
on this side of the world, austin is the place close to my heart,
is the place i need to be for every thanksgiving, every christmas
is the place where family is
is the place where all the friendships start
is the place where heart beat really fast
is the place where heart totally broken for the first time
is the place i became an adult
is the place for first job
is the place for my first house
all the late nights at mozart
all the crazy parties on the 6th
all the summer days by the lake
all the day dreaming on top of mt. bonnell
all the memories
all about being weird but being myself
all the tears, laughter, and loves
bye bye austin~
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| i guess loneliness and sickness are best friends...
i am emotionally weak b/c this cold is messing with my head and my body...
so i did nothing... sit in the bed and watch tons of soap opera and thinking of my dear dear family
being sick is the best excuse for me not to study...
i think simply a hug can cure me...
but getting that now is the hardest thing...
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